Appreciation Matters

Each of us has probably, at some time or another, felt the effects of appreciation in our life. It generates a marvelously giddy feeling of self worth and creates a human connection to others that encourages us towards even more collaborative relationships. As a leader, it is important to give appreciation because it enhances self-esteem for both giver and receiver and creates a human connection. One reason why appreciation is powerful is that, “I appreciate you” is very different than, “thank you.” While many of us were taught to say please and thank you whether we wanted to or not, because it is polite, we often do it automatically.

According to Jack Canfield, in The Success Principles, “A state of appreciation is one of the highest emotional states possible.” Sadly, while appreciation is a wonderful thing to receive, how often do we give it back to others and practice it ourselves?

An appreciation, however, is special, intimate and should always be given thoughtfully. When expressing appreciation, try to:

§  Make “I” Statements
Being appreciative is about how you feel, not the other person.  Thus, avoid “you” statements and focus on “I” statements. Tell them how you feel, not what they are. Don’t say “You are so organized”, say “I appreciate you being so organized because it means I can focus on the bigger picture.”

§  Be Specific
Avoid vague or broad language. Be specific in what you appreciate. Don’t say “You’re awesome”, say “I appreciate that you’re so punctual.”

§  Recognize the Exceptions
When someone does something that requires extra effort or under touch circumstances, recognize them for it. Say “I know we had a tight deadline for the proposal, but I appreciate you putting in the extra effort to make sure it got out on time.”

§  Appreciate the Unexceptional
Appreciate the unexceptional too. Notice when people do things right, and thank them for it. Too often we pay attention only when things go wrong. Be thankful for the good things as well

§  Describe Consequences
When appreciating something someone did, explain not only how you feel, but the positive consequences of what they did on your life. Recognize their part in your life.  For instance, “Thanks for editing my application, your input will help me get approved.”

As a leader, you can set an example for others to follow by expressing your own appreciation and making time as suggested above for your team to do so.

Once appreciation takes hold things may never be the same on your team!

“Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.”